Oh The Weather Outside is Frightful…


Shoveling the walk at 5:30 in the morning has never been as necessary as it has been this year. When you have a small dog (a puppy really) you need to whittle out a path for him to “go” If you don’t, the ice sticks to his underbelly, and worse — there’s all sorts of in-house messes you don’t even want to read about…

So here I am, PJ’s under red snowpants, not really that cold outside — pleasant in a way. I slipped my shovel into the soft mounds of snow andI felt my connection with all of the these times in the past — the peace of the silent morning, my boots crunching into the white stuff, snot dripping in long trails from my nose… lovely!

Brumph! RoaRRRRRRR! There goes the peace and quiet… Oh Lord, oh no…. I forgot, this isn’t New York where show shovels suffice for short paved walks, this is the MOTOR CITY, and my neighbors awake with glee to start up their beloved snow machines…

It doesn’t matter if there’s a half-an-inch on the ground, they’ll press their growling mechanized snow-eaters right into the pavement and grind the snow dusting away as if it fouled their property like an evil stain.

When you take into consideration the stink of the gasoline fumes, the noise, and the effort in pushing their robotic monstrosities along their 25 foot walkways, you really wonder about their sanity.

But then there’s Jim. Jim is the neighborhood inventer — and he just brought out the Hummer of snowblowers. Something he’s concocted in his Frankenstein-Monster of a “garage-lab” I nicknamed it: BADBOY. Jim doesn’t push BadBoy, he rides atop it, and I mean HIGH atop it. He must be about 6 feet off the ground. I’m not sure why Jim needs to be so high up – perhaps where he originally came from, they have 8 feet of snowfall…

So here’s BadBoy, roaring like a battletank, clearing a 3 foot wide swath. And he doesn’t just clear his path, no– Jim will clear his whole side of the street — all of the sidewalks for his neighbors. Jim is both generous, and a bit of a show-off.

Did I tell you, Jim is on the OTHER side the street. My sidewalk will need good old fashioned muscle power. And that’s how I like it.

Everyone, please be sensible. if you do need to shovel away snow… do it slowly… Don’t get a heartattack! And for those of us who live in Condos and apartments – and have others – like me – clearing the way… #$%#$@ you!

3 Comments so far

  1. Scott (unregistered) on December 9th, 2005 @ 2:30 pm

    Great sentiments Jeff. I couldn’t agree with you more!

  2. girl.in.the.d (unregistered) on December 9th, 2005 @ 9:22 pm

    Great little story. I like the drawing, too : )

  3. jeppy (unregistered) on December 10th, 2005 @ 12:04 pm

    Thanks! I thought I’d incorporate some more of my artistry with the Blog…

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